Old heathens walk into teetotal households
And demand whiskey,
Lust after unattainable women,
Refuse to keep their fantasies to themselves
And fart loudly at smart parties
While looking accusingly at titled ladies.
Old heathens eat lots of meat
And demand pork at community arts weekends.
Old heathens smoke all the time
And enjoy the taste of tobacco.
Old heathens do all things with a smile
And want everybody to like them.